Paper Hearts
by SimplyMatt
Summary: Edward has to go, has to move back home and leave the love of his life, Jasper. Home is the other side of the worlds, but both agree to say their goodbyes. I own nothing but plot


**So I had to share this with you all, hope you like it. This is a little fluff, but my kinda fluff – if that makes sense.**

**This was edited by Nmydreamz who I love, and is for Kristi and Debbie who have kept me smiling so much**

* * *

Its hard to say goodbye.

We've walked in silence towards the train station without uttering a single word, hands ghosting against one another without completing the touch. My fingers ache to be locked within his again, the place they were made for - but we promised it was time.

_You're family needs you, Edward. You must go to them._ He told me through breaking sobs which pulled at my heart. _I love you enough to know I need to make you do this._

Each step I took was torture, I struggled to keep my eyes forward and not look at my baby, the man I chose to be with rather than returning home after university. Three years together is too short though, I'm not yet ready to leave him standing on the platform of a train station and watch him drift into the distance until I can't see him anymore.

"You alright, Edward?" His gentle voice bewitches my attention, guiding my eyes to look upon my soon to be ex lover.

Stopping, I turn towards him and ignore the sea of people rushing past us, not caring we may be blocking their path. They don't understand what I'm giving up, they don't get anything.

"I hate this . . . all of it." I tell him, looking down into his dark eyes sitting like small gems surrounded by his blond curls falling down his face. Tears he is fighting back have them sparkling more than normal in the July sun, and I have to fight with myself not to guide him towards me for a kiss.

No!

Going there would make this all that much harder, have me changing my mind and leaving my mother to cope alone looking after my younger brother. As he's reminded me on more than one occasion, she needs me to go back, to support her after my fathers death. I can't do that living in another country.

"New Zealand isn't that far away, Edward." He tells me, his sad expression giving away the fact he doesn't believe his own words.

"It's far enough that I have to lose the one thing I have good in my . . . no . . . sorry, I know we agreed not to keep going over this." I stammer, jumping when he rests his hand on my shoulder.

I miss his touch, miss everything about him and how perfect we are together. Still isn't enough to keep me here, to wake each morning in his loving embrace.

With an announcement screaming from the nearby tanoid, we both look towards the direction of my train. We have less than five minutes to get my arse on board.

"Come on, you will miss your flight if you don't get on."

Would it really be so bad to stay here, be with him and send money back for my mum and brother?

Fuck, if only it was about the money. It isn't, she needs me and I promised I'd go back if she asked me to. I guess I never thought it would be this hard, leaving someone like Jasper.

No matter the amount of hours I have put in at the gym, I'm still breathless when we run the short distance with my bags and I have to rest my hand on the door. It hurts to look back at the anxious man I fell in love with, standing uncomfortably on his feet.

"You had a deal remember?" His voice is strained, like his throat is full of sobs he's tried to stifle. "Get the train without looking back, no goodbyes. Turn around, Edward. Please." He pleads, handing me my suitcase and already beginning to walk away. "Don't watch me, don't look."

I want to break our agreement, but I don't. I have adhere to our agreement, get it all over as fast as we can like pulling a plaster from my arm, one swift movement so the pain won't linger. With that in mind I turn and head toward my seat, thankful the train to London isn't as busy as expected.

I'm in my seat for less than a second when a message tone alerts me to my phone, and I see his smiling face looking back at me on the screen.

_I miss you already. Check your pocket. X x x ._

Confused and wiping tears from my eyes, I palm my body until I feel something in one of my jacket pockets. Pulling it out I notice a piece of folded scrap paper from the morning newspaper, cut into the shape of a heart. Opening the page with shaking fingers, I see his handwriting written in red pen.

_My beloved,_

_We agreed no real goodbyes, and I wanted to respect that, but I can't. Baby, I should be going to New Zealand with you, but I know you refused to let me leave my family and my degree. I respect that, but it doesn't mean I have to like it. I'm not even sure I want to be a doctor, but like you said, I can't give up on my dream. Just wanted to let you know you have my heart, and right now I think it's breaking._

_Eat your lunch now, baby. I have left you something inside._

_I love you,_

_Your Jasper._

I'm thankful the carriage is empty, because I don't want strangers seeing me kiss the paper the way I am, tears now streaming down my face. I won't wipe them away, each one is a silent prayer to have him back in my arms.

"It hurt's baby, it really hurts." I whimper, holding onto the note while rummaging through my backpack to find the lunch he packed. I'm not hungry, not in the slightest, but the need to see what he's left me is compelling.

Taking out the lunch box, I unwrap the minted lamb sandwich he made me and gasp when I see another scrap paper heart fall into my lap. A little breathless, I pick it up and unfold it to find my of my absent lovers scroll.

_Baby,_

_I will never get used to you eating those poor, little animals, but I still remember the way your face lights up when you eat this meat - murderer. Hehe. This is what I will miss the most I think, stealing kisses and tasting the mint still on your lips, even the little grease from the fat. Yes, I know you caught me eating this stuff that one time, so stop laughing. _

_Remember, baby. When you see and eat this meat, think of me, of how we lay naked on Sunday mornings lost in a hum of our passion while you hold me and eat your meal._

_That I will miss._

_You must be thirsty baby, have some tea._

_Love J._

I'm not sure how long the train has been moving, not even noticed the other passengers boarding around me. With my favourite meal discarded on the seat next to me, I open the flask of tea he made me, staring wide eyed when I remove the cup lid and the same paper heart flutters onto my lap.

This time I don't delay, I grab the note and prise it open.

_My life,_

_That's what you are you know, my life. I still don't know why you drink this shit, but I made it the way you like it, strong and dark like your men. Bad joke, but hey, my skin isn't exactly light when the sun decides to burn me. It sucks having such pale skin._

_I can still remember you bitching for months because you missed the tea from back home, but then I found this brand and you went crazy for it. Think I can still feel your cock inside me from how hard you made love to me that night, well - day. Fuck, Edward, no man will ever know how to play my body the way you do, to fuck me like a slut while still managing to make me feel loved; special._

_I love you, Edward. _

_Forever and always._

_By the way, this is the last note, sorry baby. I kissed it though, my one last kiss._

_Love your Jasper, whose heart is breaking._

People are looking at me cause I'm a grown man sobbing, cursing this short journey into London because I know once I'm on the plane its over, my life left in England breaking the way I am now.

With the train coming to a stop, I grab my things and allow the sea of people to force me into the direction of exit, pulling away angrily when some idiot grabs my wrist. Storming off ahead, I spin round ready to punch the idiot when they grab me again, yet my eyes meet with something unexpected.

Dark eyes.

Blond curls.

The reason I wake in a morning.

The last thing I see at night.

Him.

My Jasper!

"I . . . I don't understand." I murmur, pinching myself to make sure I'm not sleeping.

He smiles and moves towards me, ghosting his hand down my cheek.

"Didn't you wonder why your bag was so heavy, baby? Didn't you wonder why someone who has hardly any clothing would need a massive case?"

The thought never crossed my mind when he insisted on packing it for me, while I sat in our room crying.

"But . . . no, its too late, Jasp. My ticket is booked. I have to go, my mum needs me. We agreed." I sob, throat sore from tears.

He moves towards me and kisses my lips, causing me to groan in want before letting me go and smiling again.

"I know baby, but you're not the only one going to be flying today."

He nods when I think over what he's said, his hand finally in mine like I wanted.

"Fuck the earthquakes, sod the days flying. The moment you told me you had to leave I was already buying my ticket baby. I love you."

I'm breathless as he pulls me into his body, whispering into my ear how he is moving schools to be with me. I don't let go, regardless of the looks from strangers, because all I know, right this second, is my heart is beating again.


End file.
